Sometimes, we worry that if we don’t set high expectations for ourselves, we’re somehow letting ourselves off the hook. How I left other’s expectations behind As I began to focus more on my own interests, I began to drift away from thoughts built on the foundation of what others … This is less obvious is when our expectations involve other people. As for having high expectations from others, nobody lasts long on a pedestal without falling off. For Susan everything is about her love life when Mary doesn’t want to talk about it anymore  – or at least not so often – Susan stops being in contact with her. It will hurt a lot because you’ll realize that a part of the fault is yours. It starts when we label the others as our friend, boss or spouse. Is your soul calling you to remember who you are? What do all of these examples have in common? You may unsubscribe at any time. It’s time to embrace your potential and light. This isn’t a full list of changes that can happen with a person who can’t handle the pressure of your expectations and disapproval. You can be a demanding parent, a strict project manager or a girl-perfectionist who aims to help her partner get a promotion. These high expectations mean that the customer can be easily disappointed. We think things like you’re my spouse so you should always be nice to me. The tension is in the air all the time. High Expectations A customer of a top rated, three star restaurant is expecting to be amazed by the experience. I got tired too fast until my mom insisted on keeping focused on short-time tasks. Let me share an example of how having too high expectations for others have impacted the lives of my two coaching clients. We worry that if we loosen our expectations, other people will exploit and hurt us. Even if it’s the right time and conditions to accept a new job offer, your partner could be not ready to meet such a challenge. Many people feel so pressured by the expectations of others that it causes them to be frustrated, miserable and confused about what they should do. I just get a little irritated or disappointed when people don't live up to my expectations. But problems arise when we fail to give the right significance to expectation, such as expecting more or less from others or ourselves, than we ought to. Yet the most positive effect of high expectations is that it can boost people’s productivity. Letting go of expectations of others is a practice that requires repetition. Another reason is that we’ve lost sight of balance and we’re so wrapped up in ourselves. Mike always has like he would have been programmed to be fascinated by the universe. Sometimes, they can be daunting, but ignoring them won't make them go away. I do have high expectations of others. Our expectations were too high, and we live in a world where it’s harder to meet those expectations. You should […], […] choiceIt is expected that you have expectations of your partner. It isn't just work quality, it is morality, fitness, intelligence; the whole nine yards. Expectations. It discourages and can even aggravate inferiority complex, especially if we talk about a teenager. Het album werd voorafgegaan door de release van de singles " Don't Call Me Up", " Mad Love " en "Bad Behaviour". In reality, it’s enough to just be empathetic, and above all, to stop expecting other people to act according to your expectations. No matter what expectations I have for myself, or what other people expect of me, the only things I have 100% control over are my effort, my attitude, and my communication. Again. In a recent JSR survey of Asian students, 72% of students got through huge stress because of their parents’ high expectations. Most of us are sane enough to realize that expecting a cup of coffee to materialize from our thoughts is unrealistic. When others have expectations of us, we feel trapped, without freedom, and unhappy. Sign up for the Thought Catalog Weekly and get the best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday. These harms on relationships might be subtle at first, but later they become unbearable. If you truly want to commit to yourself, you have to do one thing that most people don’t want to do – close your backdoor. I always add 2-3 activities that I might not achieve but it always puts a sort of question “What if you do?”. Some people want attention, and they enjoy drama. It’s not necessarily to encourage others with the words “Go! I believe you can do it!”. You can say out loud this sentence: I let go of my expectations of myself to_(lose weight)__, I choose to release the pressure I put on myself and see myself with peace. These labels give us a feeling that we – in some unconscious way – “own” the person or have the permission to treat them differently than others. He couldn’t have fought against his fascination. One of his alumni confessed to me that it wasn’t his demanding behavior but the way he disapproved the slightest mistake. The Bible lays out some principles that help us form expectations and deal with the expectations of others: Communicate: Openness and honesty with ourselves and with others is the first key. And if you continue pushing your beloved, you’ll be the one who has ruined this relationship because you didn’t compromise, made your partner humiliated and exhausted with too high expectations. Do you expand your energy or do you unconsciously keep it restricted? Expecting them to change so we’d feel more comfortable around them. The biggest reason is the Susan’s love life was like a wild ride on a roller-coaster, and she expected Mary to always be there for her when she was crying over yet another breakup. There isn’t such a book about space travel that he wouldn’t have read. Spiritual Life Coach, Speaker, and Author. This sort of expectation are crushing relationships, and no relationship can survive them without harm. If you balance right, you can considerably improve the person’s self-esteem and help him or her get rid of inferiority complex. Knowing that they don’t bring you anything positive and release yourself from the fear town. Therefore, one of the people involved sooner or later wants to leave. By using our website you agree on our Terms and conditions and Privacy Policy. High Expectations received generally positive reviews from music critics. You will be accused of all problems, ignored, and soon become estranged with each other. With each new year, she used to increase her expectations of her husband. The most important while letting go of expectations is to become aware that you have them and then consciously choose to let them go. Once Mary put up some healthy boundaries, the best friend relationship was gone. 2. If the service, food and environment are sublime, expectations might be met but not exceeded. We lack the self-confidence to know our worth and be at ease with others having complete freedom, exempt from our expectations.